Middle Earth University

My college classes just got out for the quarter. Spring Break! Yay! As I was thinking about school this morning, an interesting thought came to me. What if there was a Middle Earth University. My mom and I started brainstorming classes that would be offered, so I decided to make a list of instructors and what they would teach. Each one gets three different classes. Keep in mind this is based mostly off the movies. I can't really remember the books, though I plan to reread them soon.

·         Aragorn-

1.       How to Get Women

2.       Herb lore

3.       Being Extraordinarily Gorgeous

·         Arwen-

1.       How to Get Men

2.       Speaking Elven

3.       First Aid (specializing in stab wounds)

·         Bilbo-

1.       Cartography

2.       Smoke Rings 101

3.       Story-telling

·         Boromir-

1.       Scaring Hobbits (It’s fun!)

2.       Resisting Pain (specializing in multiple arrow wounds)

3.       Nationalism

·         Eowyn-

1.       Female Rights

2.       Horseback Riding

3.       Cooking

·         Frodo-

1.       Grooming (specializing in foot hair)

2.       Anger Management

3.       Object Disposal (specializing in rings)

·         Galadriel-

1.       Mind Reading and Other Tricks

2.       Beauty & Fashion

3.       How to Sound Wise

·         Gandalf-

1.       Self-defense (specializing against Balrogs)

2.       Fireworks

3.       Smoke Rings 102

·         Gimli-

1.       Smithing

2.       Elves Are Your Friends! (Why Not to be Racist)

3.       Bragging

·         Gollum-

1.       Riddles

2.       Psychology (specializing in Dissociative Identity Disorder)

3.       Real Estate (specializing in caves)

·         King of the Dead(classes for the recently deceased)-

1.       Intimidating Mortals 101

2.       Intimidating Mortals 102

3.       Oaths and Curses

·         Legolas-

1.       Outdoing Your Friends

2.       Extreme Sports (specializing in stair surfing and elephant jumping)

3.       Martial Arts

·         Merry & Pippin-

1.       Pilfering From Sam’s Garden

2.       Pilfering Gandalf’s Fireworks

3.       Talking to Trees

·         Sam-

1.       Gardening

2.       Ethics- Loyalty (Honor Course)

3.       Gollum Name Calling

·         Saruman-

1.       Army Management

2.       Speech

3.       Trapping People and Keeping Them Trapped (specializing in killing giant eagles)

·         Sauron-

1.       Jewelry Making (specializing in rings)

2.       You Are Special (Regaining Self Confidence After a Massive Defeat)

3.       Working in Extreme Conditions (specializing in volcanoes)

·         Theoden-

1.       Dealing With Grief

2.       Regaining Youth

3.       Seeing Through Deceit

·         Wormtongue-

1.       How to Not Get Women

2.       Being a Creep

3.       Backstabbing