My Dream Log- Day 1

Part One

Last night I dreamt...

"You're late," the teacher informed me as I walked through the classroom door.

My eyes darted to Will, somehow already seated at his 7th year desk. I don't know how he got there so fast. He purposefully avoided my gaze, knowing full well it was his fault. Instead, he appeared totally fascinated by his whispered conversation with Lily.

He had stopped me about a block from class, calling my name to come over to his hastily constructed stand. A cardboard sign sat on top of it that said, "A kiss for two stones." I rolled my eyes. He was getting so desperate now that he wasn't even assigning any value to his kisses. The worst part was, I knew exactly who this had been set up for. Me, of course. Everyone knew that he had a huge crush on me. I couldn't return his feelings though. He was a jerk to everyone, including me.

With a sigh, I came up to his stand. I didn't want to encourage him, but he was calling my name. Ignoring him felt too rude, even toward him. "Hello, Will. What are you doing?"

Leaning back in his wooden chair, he looked up at me with an expression I assume was supposed to be attractive. "Just making it easy for you to kiss the love of your life," he said in silky tones.

"Thanks, but I'm really not interested," I told him, unimpressed.

For a moment he seemed disappointed. Only for a moment. "But you do admit I'm the love of your life!" he proclaimed with a triumphant laugh.

I held my hands up in mock surrender. "Yep, you caught me. I'm absolutely, madly in love with you. Now, will you please leave me alone?" Not waiting for an answer, I turned and began walking away.

I stopped and looked back as I heard a voice say, "Hey, Will!"

It was Lily, greeting him with her regular enthusiasm as she dropped an armful of rocks in front of him. I watched as she leaned in close and whispered loudly, "I hate you." Then she kissed him hard. They had an odd relationship, if you could call it that.

Clenching my fists, I turned away and kept walking toward class. I wasn't sure why I was jealous, or if that was even what I was feeling.

Part Two

After making the required apology to my teacher, I sat at the desk marked with a large 8. This was my eighth year attending the Institute of Open Minds. It took nine years to graduate from this school, but that didn't seem too long to me. I was the only eighth year in this class.

My desk was covered with these dumb plastic rings, each one proudly displaying the image of some cartoon character. I looked up to see if someone was pulling a prank on me, but every other desk was also filled with random things. Some were filled with clothing, others with portable games, others with jewelry. Mine was the dumbest by far though.

Apparently, since it was almost Christmas break, today we were supposed to have brought some of our unwanted items to trade with the class. I had forgotten, but it didn't matter. I wouldn't have been able to get anything anyway. Someone had to be at the desk at all times while others were wandering around to trade for things, and since I was the only one of my year, I had to stay where I was.

After all the trades were finished, I got up and went over to Sarah to see what she got. In front of her was a blue shirt, folded neatly. I grabbed for it.

"That's mine," she snapped.

I gave her a strange look. "I just want to see it."

"It's mine," she grumbled, but she let me take it.

I unfolded it and held it up. It was lovely, blue with little bits of gold and diamond attached to it in places. "It's very nice," I told her with a smile. She smiled shyly back before snatching it out of my hands.

Part Three

The desks were quickly swept out of the way and our chairs were gathered in a semi-circle facing our teacher. She smiled at us. "Okay, everyone. I want us to go around the circle and say what you're going to get at least one person for Christmas."

They were excited to obey. You could feel the anticipation for winter break building up inside each of them, ready to explode. Some spoke of gifts for their family, others said things they would buy for people in the class. One person said he would get the teacher a frog board, which made her smile.

Then it was Lily's turn. She gave me a big, bright smile. "I'm going to get Will a kiss from Arriah for Christmas!"

That made the whole class laugh as I stared at her. Once the laughter had died down, the next person said, "I'm going to get Will a kiss from Arriah too!"

This time, instead of laughter, everyone in the class began to say they were going to get Will the same. I looked around at everyone in shock, my eyes wide.

...And then I woke up.

Nightmares

Open your now tear-filled eyes, and look around you to see that there's nothing but shadows. Breathe a sigh of relief while trying to clear your mind of the terrifying images that were haunting you. There's no one around. Tell yourself that everything will be fine. Realize that only makes things worse, because things are not fine. If they were fine, your heart wouldn't be beating against your chest like a bird searching for an escape.

It's time to calm down. You won't accomplish anything if you can't get your terror under control. Force your mind to stop thinking about the things that could've happened and the things that might yet happen. Put a halt to the fears, the tears, the screaming, and the dreaming. It will all... be... fine...

Let yourself sink into peaceful darkness.

Mathahnus

Silver threads spun by spiders
With tears of morning on the precious lines,
Against the sun soon to set,
The steady flowing rivers clear her mind.

Ah, Mathahnus, you are ice.
Your words are the burn that pretends to be heat.
Though it feels like touching flames,
You see through the feeling and know the deceit.

Leaves of gold wave under brilliant skies,
Until the clouds gather in their hatred of life.
Then decay sets in to brown the edges,
And life is extinguished like a throat and a knife.

Ah, Mathahnus, you are night.
With all the heavens trying to destroy your shadows,
With all the stars to fill you,
For everyone to see, you're still left dark and hollow.

Will the sun, the light of hope, come again?
Sometimes for dark dwelling creatures it is hard to believe.
The black and despair are so consuming
That light seems to wither before its touch while all hope leaves.

Falling

I know that when the leaves fall

We will no longer stand tall,

For beneath the weight of their call

We are made to feel small.

We know when we have lost,

But do we know the cost?

Back and forth again we're tossed,

Our fate is cold as frost.

It's too late to fight.

We're given to night.

The bands are drawing tight

The strength of our plight.

We're in the flame

With none to blame.

The people grow lame.

Same is our aim.

No more rhyme.

Our minds fade.

Our wills are gone.

What is left?

We live?

Not here.

United death

Is all.

Soon

We

Will be

Gone.

Bye.

Confusing Stuff I Wrote In My Journal

Wisdom twists and turns around the bend of fate that we create. With our books, our songs, our speeches, the world we envision is made.

In every shadow rests a word. A word springing from danger, fear, superstition. Why do we fear the dark? Because our worst words wait there. Each one of us in powerless to stop them. They can only be erased by thousands of words from thousands of mouths.

Even then all may be lost. For they have been forgotten before only to creep back into the thoughts of a few and spread like a plague.

Often the light sharpens the shadows that they may pierce all the deeper. For it too is made from words. Often it is believed that the words come from the light. But if that were so, we would not have so many shadows. Unless all shadows and all lights were the same.

The World

The world.

It resides in winter. A winter of fire.

Hot and bright. Cold and dark. Everywhere and nowhere.

Silence prevails above the infinite noise. The terrible silence of apathy. It hides at the edges of speech. And behind the eyes.

Eyes and ears are closed.None will ever know and see but a few. The few cannot overcome except the world realizes. And the world is them. They are the world.

How to Write an Essay- Research

I've written some pretty good essays in my time as a student. As writing is my strong point and I take a lot of English classes as electives, I typically get good grades on them. I'm going to be posting a little guide on writing an essay, one piece at a time, whenever I get the time to write up a post. Here's the first one on research:

Research
For me, this has always been the hardest part of writing an academic essay. Not only do I have to find several sources on my topic, but they have to be what the teacher considers reliable as well. This typically means no Wikipedia, .gov/.org/.edu over .com, and fully citable. Often more than one type of source is required, such as book, Internet, and article. These are the things I keep in mind while looking for sources:

1. Finding Sources- When looking for sources, always consider the amount of time you have to work on the project. If you only have a week, a few articles will probably benefit you more than a dozen thick books. Obviously the first places to check for sources are Google (always make sure any Internet sites are reliable and citable; don't just assume that the first link on the list is the best!) and the library (honestly not every book is fully reliable either, but most teachers are far more willing to accept these without a second glance...). Other possible sources change with the topic, but some examples are newspaper articles, scholarly journals, and historical documents. If you find a source that doesn't have enough information or isn't citable, check to see if it has a bibliography that can provide you with more sources.
2. Creative Sources- It's probably a good idea to check with your teacher before you use these, but I don't think they should have a problem with it. These can be fun and add a bit of flare to both your essay and your bibliography. Some ideas are: museums, advertisements, old pictures (these can actually provide a lot of info. Just make sure they aren't fake), interviews, movies, zoos/aquariums, old letters or diary entries, and historical artifacts.
3. Citation- Every teacher will have different requirements on how much information is required to make a source citable. I've had some want only a title and author, while others want that plus publisher, date, location, associated organizations, and link (if available). The first kind is easy, but the latter set can be almost impossible to find on the Internet. Even most government websites, which many of my teachers have considered total wins for my bibliography, will not have that much information available. Books are generally the best option in this case as they provide all the copyright and publishing information. If you're not certain whether you have enough information for your source, either ask your teacher or (if you're turning in a rough draft) just go with it. The teacher will likely mark your lack of information so that you can fix it before you turn in a final copy. I know this sounds like the lazy way, but I generally feel uncomfortable talking to my teachers about such things unless they can be contacted through email, and it's always worked for me.

There are my ideas for finding and citing sources. If you have any questions, feel free to email me at propheciesofshadow@yahoo.com or post a comment on the Arriah Dreamscribe Facebook page. Next time I'll be posting about getting started on the paper. I hope this is helpful!